"

Forever trusting who we are,

and nothing else matters.

I'm afraid to go to Romania.

I'm afraid of falling in love with children and leaving them.

I'm afraid of seeing the hurt, the pain.

I can deal with my own, just not that of others.

I'm afraid that my empathy will consume me and bring me down.

I just hope that I can be fully invested in the service of sweet souls, that I will forget myself. Or at least put myself on hold for a while. Those children need me.

Sometimes when I'm lying in bed, I think about their baby hands and I'm not afraid anymore. I picture these children that I know not yet, but already love completely. Their hands need something to hold. They need me and all the love I have and am willing to give. 

The only thing that matters right now is making sure I'm going forward. I need to put the past away, put people in the past away, put my mistakes in the past away. Nothing else matters.